September 25, 2012
My daughter & her girlfriends were hanging out (at this age, they don't "play". they "hang out".) upstairs when they rowdily came downstairs to the kitchen, where I was in the midst of a little craftiness (which came in a surprising spurt last weekend). I was making shortbread cookies, frosting them with orange and decorating into basketballs, for my son's birthday celebration.
The girlfriends squealed: "See? Your mom *is* cool!"
I felt smug. I felt affirmed. I felt welcomed.
It was almost like I myself was back in middle school, wanting somehow to fit in, wanting to be wanted. Wanting to fit in with my daughter and her friends, wanting to be wanted by my daughter and her friends.
I feel like my tweenagehood and teenagehood was so recent. I remember it vividly. I remember feeling increasingly estranged from my mom, from my parents. I remember feeling the angst and wallowing in it, feeling lonely with only one or two people I would really regard as confidantes.
This is new territory for me, parenting a tween daughter. Have you been through it? Do you remember feeling like you wanted to be wanted, feeling encouraged when labeled "cool" by her friends?