Alone in the car: not until they're 18?
I have very recently become a mama to three offspring. Lordly-lord, it can be tough to mobilize these young folk. Getting out the door means three jackets, three pairs of shoes (or foot coverings), three bags of their own stuff. Then, getting into and out of the car is yet another challenge.
Sometimes, my 9-year old asks if she can stay in the car while I fetch the younger siblings. I say, "sure". Why not? She's sitting reading in the car parked right in front of the school. If we were down the block from where I was going, I wouldn't do it. Then, the other day, she asked if she could stay in the car while I did some grocery shopping. While I was reaaallllllly tempted, I decided against it. And, for some reason, only then did it occur to me that I didn't know what the law was here in Oregon (every state has its own motor vehicle laws) about leaving your kids in the car alone.
It looks like Oregon law is sort of open-ended, as ORS 163.545 states:
A person having custody or control of a child under 10 years of age commits the crime of child neglect in the second degree if, with criminal negligence, the person leaves the child unattended in or at any place for such period of time as may be likely to endanger the health or welfare of such child.
... which means to say that leaving a child under 10 alone in a car could or could not be considered neglect? So it depends on the circumstances?
Well, if that's the case, what are your thoughts on leaving a child alone in the car? Have you done it? Under what circumstances? Will you never do it? Will you do it under certain circumstances only?
I leave them buckled in (parked right next to the bank doors) so I can walk in and use the ATM in the foyer- I can see them the entire time. I'm afraid to leave one or both because i had a scare when I was young. I can't think of another place I'd be where I'd feel ok leaving them. Maybe if Dad was in the car too!
Posted by: carie | November 09, 2009 at 03:44 PM
My daughter was probably closer to 8 before I'd leave her in the car, and that was only for a moment, where I could see her--but I'd still crack the windows, lock the doors and set the car alarm. If we had a friend of similar age with us, I'd go maybe 5 minutes (a quick run into the post office or to grab a to-go cup of coffee). Honestly, I was never comfortable with it--I'd be rushed and on pins and needles the whole time.
She's 12 now and I'll leave her for longer, but the car is still locked and alarmed (windows cracked, of course) and she's got a cell phone. Mostly I make her suck it up and come in with me. Depending on what it is, sometimes I'll send her in on the errand and I'll wait in the car. Or I leave her home.
When she was little, we lived in a state where you had to pump your own gas. Again, I'd crack the windows and lock her in, even though I was right there. And if I had to go in to pay, I'd take her with me. Seems like I remember around that time a baby getting snatched out of mini-van while mom was pumping gas, but that might have been an urban legend.
I delayed a lot of day care pick-ups and skipped eating a lot of lunches over the years in order to run errands alone, just so I didn't have to deal with dragging her in and out of the car. Sometimes that takes longer than the errand itself! I also decided that a lot of stuff just wasn't worth it and would skip it all together, if I could.
Posted by: Sheryl | November 09, 2009 at 04:16 PM
I can't leave them. I remember watching an Oprah where the mom left her 3 kids in the car as she ran back into the house to grab something, and in that time, for some reason, her car exploded. I think that 2 of her children died, one severely burned. I couldn't live with myself, so it's worth the effort and nuisance to take them with me.
Posted by: mom | November 09, 2009 at 05:05 PM
Yeah, I have 3 kids and I have yet to leave them alone in the car at all. Which is interesting, as I do occasionally let the oldest, who is 7, walk to school alone.
Really, though, I think it is more likely for my kids to be injured fooling around in the car (disengaging the parking brake, etc.), then for my son to be injured on the 3 block walk to school.
Of course, there is always the possibility of carjacking or kidnapping. I think it is more likely that a criminal would steal my car (probably without realizing my kids were in the back--that's usually how those stories play out) than my son would get kidnapped walking from school. Although the possibility of either occurring is slim-to-none.
Anyway, I actually make an effort to walk wherever possible. Baby in stroller or Ergo, big kids walking or on bikes/scooters. Being a mom of 3, I know it's in my best interest to tire those buggers out.
Posted by: egl | November 09, 2009 at 06:14 PM
When my daughter was a baby I was so crazed with sleep deprivation and overwhelmed with the new mom thing that when she fell asleep in the car I would leave her in the car parked on the street in front of my house and just keep checking on her every few minutes until she woke up. I live in NE, and not in the best of areas and now I can't believe I did that. I just did not want to wake her up by transferring her to the house, which was what happened every time I tried that. But I would never do this with my son, who is four months old. Live and learn I guess, but it still makes me nervous when I think about having done that.
Posted by: jd | November 09, 2009 at 06:17 PM
My daughter is only 22-months right now, so obviously I don't leave her alone in the car when I go into the grocery store or whatever. And I can't say how I'll feel about this when my child gets to be 10, 11, or 12. My opinions and attitudes change as I become more comfortable in my parenting skin, usually changing in the direction of me relaxing a bit and being less obsessive of things.
All that said, I distinctly remember when I was 12 years old. I was a babysitter to 3 kids at the same time, ages 4-9 (ish). That was also the age I flew alone to from Denver to Washington, DC via Chicago. My dad decided that I would be fine making my way to my connecting flight through O'Hare with no escort. I got off the plane to discover that my flight had been cancelled. I calmly went up to the desk, explained my situation, they put me on another flight and told me the gate. Then I made my way across the airport to the gate. When I was unsure if I was going in the right direction, I stopped and asked for directions. I firmly believe that allowing me to do this was the single best thing my parents did for me - it gave me confidence and pride. And I should note I grew up in a very small town (pop. 2500), so it's not as if making my way through a very busy airport was a normal thing for me. But, after that, I was confident that I could handle anything that was thrown at me.
I know everyone worries about the random accident, but I worry more about not allowing my child to have enough independence to find out she is capable of dealing with a myriad of situations thrown her way. The world is no less safe than it was 30 years ago (if stats are to believed, it's safer). I believe that it's not about whether it's a hassle to take the kids in and out of the store, but rather about picking these low risk times to allow our children some independence.
I firmly believe we need to give our kids some space and stop being so paranoid about random explosions (Oprah is great at getting us all scared about the one in a million chances) and stranger kidnappings. I thank my parents so much for having the bravery to put aside their fears of these types of things and letting me learn to live independently.
Posted by: Megan | November 09, 2009 at 06:30 PM
Ah! We have a real problem with this. I own a baby store, and we have people leave there babies unattended in the car EVERY SINGLE DAY. We do our best to make sure the parents understand that it is perfectly ok with us if they shop with their babies (I swear this is what they say their reasoning is).
It can be very tricky for us to deal with. The babies safety is our top priority, but how to do this without shaming the parent in public? If you could see how many people are doing this, you would be surprised. These are often attachment parenting folks who do EC, babywearing, co-sleeping etc. They are loving, intelligent, thoughtful parents who love their babies. And they leave them in the car. For LONG periods of time. What would you do?
Posted by: Anon Store Owner | November 09, 2009 at 07:23 PM
I also left my daughter napping in the car she fell asleep from about 1-3 years old--windows down, only in the summer when it was warm, parked in our driveway off of the street. I also will leave her in the car at a gas station when I have to run in to pay if I can see her at all times (she is now 5--i've been doing that for maybe a year). That being said, I work in a childcare facility and very often parents will come back because they forgot something and leave the child in the car, or drop off one child while a (very young) sibling waits in the car--it drives me crazy. Sometimes I see parents chatting with another parent or staff member say, "well, i guess i better go, little susie is waiting in the car." after having a conversation of 5+ minutes. I guess for me it's more about having the visual and knowing they're in the car, not upset or freaked out or hurt, etc. I don't know if this is right or not, just my comfort level.
Posted by: K | November 09, 2009 at 09:15 PM
Anon Store Owner -
That is quite disturbing. Thanks for looking out for the babies. Maybe you could post a sign with the statute? As an aside, I know DHS will sometimes pursue contacting families who do this on a regular basis.
There was a news story recently out of Aloha where a mom left her child in the carseat while she ran into the daycare and came back to someone having scoped it out and trying to carjack her. Sorry, but there is a lot more in terms of risk than a "one in a million car explosion". There are plenty of other ways to foster independence for your children other than putting their well beings at risk.
Posted by: E | November 09, 2009 at 09:28 PM
I recently called the police when a neighbor left her daughter in the car while she came into our local coffee shop, ordered coffee and sat down, all while the 5 year old squirmed in the back seat of a car, sans car seat. I since see the neighbor off and on, and it's always a bit awkward, wondering if she knows it was me who called, but I still think I did the right thing....
Posted by: anon.. | November 09, 2009 at 09:42 PM
I will leave my napping baby in her car seat with the van parked in our driveway. I leave the sliding door open, and park it right up next to the house window, which I also open. I'll use that time to tidy things up in the room where I can see/hear her.
She's not visible from the street in that configuration.
If someone came up the driveway and tried to get her out, I'd hear her and be out there so fast with a butcher knife and screaming that you wouldn't believe it.
Posted by: Mamamamama | November 09, 2009 at 10:11 PM
We haven't had the same experience as "anon store owner". However, we have a large and conspicuous play area in the shop, so maybe that makes a difference?
Or maybe folks just aren't announcing to us - "hey my baby's unattended in the car, can you help me with this sling?"
Have I ever left MY child alone in the car? Yes. It isn't routine, it is never for long, and it is under circumstances that feel safe to me (car visible and locked and so on) but it has happened.
Posted by: Tony at Milagros | November 10, 2009 at 05:18 AM
Unfortunately, I'm too paranoid to leave my kids in the car anymore. When I had a 6 month old, I left her in her car seat (sleeping) while I was parked using the ATM machine in the bank. A lady looked in the car, saw the baby and got back in her car and got her cell phone out. I thought she might be calling the police so I immediately went back to the car and left. Frankly, I think some people are just too nosy but then again, you always hear about some mom leaving their kid in the car in hot weather and dying.....
Posted by: Tiffany | November 10, 2009 at 08:54 AM
I will not leave kids alone in the car. I also am concerned about the random horrible thing or kids playing with gear; someone breaking into a car or stealing a car, both which have happened to me in Portland (I watched the theft, he was running from security and saw keys in the car). Or someone hitting your car. I'm sure any of those people who had a one in a million incident wish they'd not taken the risk. Also, Megan, there's no way to tell if things are safer now than 30 years ago because of increased vigilance, which is something that is generally accepted. When I think about Seattle 35 years ago, where I was growing up, the population was much different, it was probably nearly half, and the culture was quite different. The incident in Chicago with the child being beaten to death raised the issue that actually many children are killed across the country in incidents in which there is no intervention (and many other horrible things that lead up to the tragedies).
I also think it's just a slippery slope not to take the time to do things mindfully with children, but to get wrapped up in mama trying to get things done. I found myself trying to push things and found it stressful and exhausting. It felt more manageable to do less and with more time. And when I try to push my son into something, he subtly and suddenly turns stubborn and resistant, rather than his usual agreeable self. So that makes me realize how he feels when someone is not giving him the appropriate attention. Of course I only have one, and 3 kids would be hard. I think I'd have to learn to corral the older ones into taking more responsibility and doing more of the logistics. For the older one who wants to stay in the car, the carrot is that the faster she can help get the errand done, the sooner she can be on her own at home again.
Posted by: Rosemary | November 10, 2009 at 09:21 AM
My youngest kids are 10 and 12 and I still don't like leaving them in the car. I am more likely to leave them home than take them to the grocery store. At home they know not to open the door to strangers, to keep a phone near by and never to turn on the stove while I'm gone. I feel this allows independence and lets them know I trust them while putting them at less risk than sitting in parking lot. If they really don't want to come in the store, and I don't want to take them home first I will let them stay in the car, together and with a cell phone. I don't worry about them making bad decisions I worry about people seeing them alone. A wierdo looking for a victim will skip the kids with adults near and look for the ones unattended. That's my fear. Brooke Willberger was 19 and still a wierdo got her. I always tell my kids "safety in numbers" and watch out for each other.
Posted by: Sandi | November 10, 2009 at 10:07 AM
I broke up with a friend over this. I had a morning to myself.. went to the craft store and ran into my friend. She chatted and walked and talked with me until I thought to ask her where the kids were. She left them outside in the car strapped to the car seats. Little toddlers both of them. I never felt the same way about her again. Within a month, I had edged myself out of her life.
Posted by: philomom | November 10, 2009 at 10:08 AM
My daughter is 2 yrs old and I have left her in the car while I ran back into the house to grab something (usually something important like diapers or her blankie), but I only do this if I know where the item is that I am looking for. If it isn't a bee line, I'm pulling her out of the car seat to come with me. I feel comfortable doing that, I know my neighbors and my neighborhood -- I would never ever leave her in the seat to do a quick errand, whether or not I can see her the whole time.
If she fell asleep in the car when I needed to do an errand I would either wake her up or postpone the errand.
I'm not paranoid, but why take any chances?
Posted by: Stephanie | November 10, 2009 at 10:57 AM
I agree that leaving very young children in the car while you're shopping is regrettable and potentially dangerous; at age nine, though, I think a child is responsible enough to be left alone for short periods of time, especially if you're shopping at a place where you know many of the customers/business owners around. and at five? while many of us feel we couldn't risk the worst-case scenario, if it's in front of a coffee shop and the child is simply uncomfortable, I hardly think it's child abuse. I'm concerned that we so often jump to calling the police and DHS (or seriously considering it) when a far friendlier method of dealing with a problem would be to approach the parent and say you're concerned. anon.: if you were there watching the child, couldn't you have just tapped your neighbor on the shoulder and said, 'your daughter looks uncomfortable. would you like me to chat with her while you get your coffee?'
as someone who's had both the police and DHS called on her (a son who screams in anger out open windows and another little one who has a preternaturally amazing talent with the doorknobs will do that for you), I can report that it's humiliating and terrifying and, in every case, I wasn't doing anything dangerous or abusive or even out of the ordinary (given the behavioral challenges). if anon shop owner is correct, DHS couldn't take every kid whose parents left them in the car, or all of us posting here (but me, I'm definitely not qualified) would have to step in and take in the foster kids of our neighbors, who make unfortunate choices. philomom, I think your approach was understandable: to recognize that choice was one you found too deplorable to forgive, and simply work out of her life. I wonder if you felt comfortable confronting her about it? (I also wonder if it would have done any good; we're often defensive, we mamas!)
on the other hand, choosing whether to leave my kids in the car is a problem that I, who don't drive, never encounter any more :) the closest I come is having let my seven-year-old run around in the courtyard at People's Co-op while I go inside with his little brothers to buy something. there are so many friendly hippies, there, though, that I feel it's ok.
Posted by: sarah gilbert | November 10, 2009 at 11:34 AM
I have left my kids in the driveway, car off, door open while napping. We have a long driveway and I stay by the window to watch them. I have also left them locked in car, car off, seat belted in while I run into the cleaners or to get a slice of pizza or something....but only if I get a parking spot right by the door. I am never left them more than 5 minutes.
Posted by: holden | November 10, 2009 at 12:30 PM
When I was growing up, I witnessed a 4 year old get in mom's car (we were at a ranch), and within 10 seconds, put the car in neutral. It coasted backwards down a hill, faster than anyone could get to it, crashed through a fence (mind you, child was unbuckled in the front seat) and finally stopped INCHES from falling into a concrete wash. It doesn't have to be an explosion to be VERY dangerous. Kids are fast. Don't leave them in the car.
Posted by: SW Mama | November 10, 2009 at 03:19 PM
I am certain my sister and I probably had to sit and wait in the car many times, my Grandmother was really bad about going to a mall and leaving us in the car while she ran in for "one minute", only to return an hour later. I will never forget how much that frustrated and scared me. I personally wouldn't feel comfortable taking the chance of leaving my sons in the car alone for any matter of time.
Posted by: Heidi | November 10, 2009 at 03:50 PM
As a child, I typically opted to wait in the car while my mom grocery shopped... there's no way I would do that with my kids. It just seems unsafe and I do worry about other people's potential actions/ reactions.
However, I regularly leave my girls (10 and 7) in the car while I run in to pick up my son from a friend's house (5 min. or so). This didn't start until this year, and I feel pretty comfortable with their ability to activate the alarm when I'm just inside the house.
I guess I'm more afraid of the pranks they'll pull on me when I get back in the car (all windshield wipers on, radio full blast, flashers flashing, etc.)....luckily I always take the keys and set the emergency brake, which they know better than to mess with. Again, educating them is key, and they can always get out and come in if they need to.
Posted by: leslie | November 10, 2009 at 05:04 PM
I don't leave my child in the car anymore. A couple of years ago, I ran into a pet store and left my 6 year old daughter in the car, parked right in front where I could see her. It was pouring rain and I knew I would only be a minute. I was sure I had my eyes on the car the WHOLE time I was in there, which was not more than a couple of minutes. Well, it's impossible to keep your eye on the car/child every second. When I got back to the car, she said a man had tried to open her door. I saw this guy standing by the store and then walk away when I came out. By the time my daughter told me what had happened, he was nowhere in sight. This incident really creeped me out. I'd rather be safe than sorry, even if it is an inconvenience at times.
Posted by: Jennifer | November 10, 2009 at 06:22 PM
While I'm not a huge fan of authority, I do think there's a place for calling the police when there's an issue of illegality (no car seat, sitting for a coffee in a cafe where one can't see the child), and I don't think people should hesitate. It's not anti-mom, but pro-kid. There are reasons behind this law...
Posted by: anon.. | November 10, 2009 at 07:58 PM
I am a little curious why the title of this post says "not until they're 18" ... when the law quoted, i.e., ORS 163.545 states, child under 10 years. I guess I am saying / wondering -- it doesn't seem from the postings here that anyone is concerned with teens being left alone, right?
Posted by: Joan | November 11, 2009 at 12:36 PM
And as Tiffany mentioned, there is the issue of leaving kids in cars in hot or even moderately warm weather, even with the windows cracked a bit ... it can get very stiflingly hot in cars, particularly if they're sitting in the sunshine, even if it's only 70 or so degrees out. Many young children do die every year strapped in their car seats -- though it's usually the case that their distracted parents forgot they were there, as opposed to deliberately leaving them there. (There was a very in-depth article about this terrible phenomenon a while ago in the Washington Post -- http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/02/27/AR2009022701549.html )
But if it's just for a few minutes while you run back into the house or get cash from an ATM, and you've got a view of the car ... I've done this with my four-year-old son, as I'm sure most of us have. But then sometimes I get paranoid -- What if I'm mugged at the ATM? What if I trip and hurt myself when I'm running back into the house, and I can't get back to the car quickly? I just try to be as prudent as I can be.
Posted by: kerns mama | November 11, 2009 at 01:20 PM
I've been so tempted to leave my 4 year old strapped and locked in when I run into Little Caeser's to pick up one of their already-made cheese pizzas, which takes about 1 minute, but I just can't bring myself to do it. Maybe it feels like starting there will lead me to do it for longer periods of time in more risky situations. I do often leave her sleeping in the car where I can see her. I often do yard work in the summer with her sleeping, or when I can see her out the window, I back the car into the driveway wherever I am so I can have a direct view. Extra blanket in the winter, all windows down in the summer. If your kid needed a nap as bad as mine, and will not go down for a nap, you would understand! :) But I am not sure how old she would need to be before I would pull up and leave her for a minute, even at pre-school just to run in and get blankie. I guess it's a case by case thing, and each kid matures at a different rate.
Posted by: Debby | November 12, 2009 at 01:05 PM
My girls have sat in the car while I have run inside. Can you imagine the chaos of waking up two kids under 3 to run into Papa Murphy's and then try to balance two exhausted screaming kids and a pizza back into the car. I have to make a concession here and there to maintain my sanity. In some circles carrying one in to bed while leaving the other to sleep in the car in the meantime would be deplorable, I do that every day. My kids are too young to escape from their seats, and with a lock and alarm system I feel okay with it in tiny amounts and a clear view and path to my car.
Posted by: anon | November 12, 2009 at 06:48 PM
i leave my kids in the car in the driveway all the time to run back in the house for something. maybe i'm a craaaaazy risk-taker, but that scenario just doesn't seem like that big of a deal to me. i also recently left them once while i went to the ATM, and i've done it to pick-up our farm share, too, both of these with the car fully visible, etc. while i do have thoughts of crazy tragedies like those mentioned above, i also try to balance those out with a dose of logic and rational thought. and i think there is a difference between dashing back in the house and going into a store to go shopping for an extended period of time. don't know when/if i'll feel comfortable doing the latter, but 9 seems like a good time to start having those conversations.
Posted by: kcb | November 12, 2009 at 07:53 PM
Trying to get a clumsy diaper bag, baby, screaming tantruming 2 y.o., and a wayward 5 y.o. across a crowded and busy parking lot seems a hell of a lot more dangerous than letting them sit in the car while you get some cash from the ATM (or pick up a pizza from Papa Murphy's or get a coffee or whatever). I think we've gone a little nutso, mamas.
Posted by: I'll never call DHS on you | November 12, 2009 at 08:50 PM
Check out the NISMART-2 study. There are some good facts about abductions. Statistically, teenagers are the ones most commonly abducted by strangers. "Eighty-one percent of nonfamily abducted children and 58 percent of sterotypical kidnapping victims were age 12 or older."
As far as the original post. I have left my kids in the car when I can see them, or to run in the house to get something, or when picking up another child from school, but I can't say it ever sits well with me. I'm always nervous. That said, my oldest is getting to be the age (6 1/2) when I want him to do more on his own, and be able to navigate public spaces a bit on his own. I agree with the posts that there are other dangers in cars aside from abductions. I'm more concerned with them hurting themselves or moving the car or it being too hot or something. After reading this study it actually made me more interested in getting my kids savvy about being by themselves. Oh, and being careful about who I leave them with!
http://www.missingkids.com/en_US/documents/nismart2_nonfamily.pdf
Posted by: mama | November 12, 2009 at 09:08 PM
I actually did this yesterday, and am not ashamed to admit it. My son fell asleep in the car when I pulled into New Seasons and I did not want to wake him up. Realizing someone could call the cops while I ran into the store to buy some fish, I paid a homeless woman $2 to hang out next to the car. Yep, when I came back out she was still there, my son was still sleeping, and I gratefully paid her and left.
Posted by: michele | November 14, 2009 at 02:23 PM
I absolutely would never for a minute leave my kids in the car. I was at Peet's in Happy Valley and there was a large black SUV parked out front with a toddler and a perhaps a 3 year old. One was sleeping and one was awake. It took me over 5 minutes to locate the Mother. She owned the Juice shop next door and was in the back room. Completely out of sight. I called the police and reported her. She felt it was ok because the car was locked even though she could not see them or hear them. And the windows were completely rolled up. I have read one too many stories about a well meaning few minutes gone horribly wrong.
Posted by: Erika P. | November 17, 2009 at 08:04 AM
P.S. The police were glad I called and referred to the woman's choice as "bad parenting." I felt relieved when he said this, validating my horror of finding two unattended very small children in a car.
This is the same Happy Valley that had a car jacking in which my neighbor was shot in broad daylight, 8am. So I guess I'm hyper sensitive about this.
Posted by: Erika P. | November 17, 2009 at 08:12 AM
Late to the comments here, but to back up Michele's reasoning (and Sarah Gilbert's earlier one), I feel supremely more comfortable leaving my 5 y.o. with a complete stranger nearby than with no one around. I've even done the opposite of this topic - left my daughter in a store while I went back to the car for my wallet.
Posted by: Nat West | November 18, 2009 at 03:57 PM
Wow. Seems to be a lot of fear and panic out there. I leave my 7 month old in my driveway to nap with the doors locked and windows cracked. I check on her every few minutes and feel very comfortable leaving her there.
Not sure what will happen when she is older - I will likely do what feels right, seems to be working for us so far...
Posted by: nsl | November 23, 2009 at 08:15 PM
remembering when i was a kid i went to a cubs game with my sunday school teacher. he picked up all the kids at there houses and we all rode in the back of his pick-upto the game....times change
Posted by: jturnbull | June 20, 2010 at 05:02 PM
I was wondering if anyone had come back to this post after the mom left her kids in the car on Hawthorne, with the car running, I believe, while she checked out something at a sidewalk sale, and the car was stolen.
Why do people do this? Because they think it won't happen to them even though it has happened to others? Or they just think it's worth the risk? Or worth making their kids feel nervous and insecure?
Posted by: Rosemary | June 21, 2010 at 02:50 PM
I too I have left my 3 young kids in the car (in view) while I duck over to an ATM or return library books in an outdoor slot etc. but I think after reading some posts, especially by jennifer about how a man had tried to open the door with her 6 year old inside - yeah that makes me too nervous. I think I'll have to rethink my ways.
Posted by: mardi | June 23, 2010 at 01:18 AM
I have a 2 and 4 year old and am very selective about leaving them in the car. I do leave them in the car in our driveway to unload the groceries, but we live on a quiet cul-de-sac, and I'm in and out within 30 seconds. I will also leave them in the car at our local video store because the car is within 30 feet of me and I can see them at all times (with doors locked). Twice within the last week, someone has publicly chewed me out for this, once in front of my children. I think this is inexcusable. That undermining of my parenting is far more dangerous to my children than keeping them in a contained, monitored situation. I think it would be easier for someone to kidnap them if they were running around the video store with me. They run off and I can't keep my eyes on them every second like I can when they're safe in the car!
Posted by: TiredofCriticism | April 16, 2013 at 11:50 AM
Everyone is so paranoid - makes me wonder if its real. You never leave child eating in other room? Taking bath? (You really sit by 2 year old all the time?) never leave him playing in the car? Chances of suffocating on a toy are 10000000 times higher than car exploding with child (which would have same result should you stay in car) want to be safe 100%? Stay home
Posted by: Dima | April 20, 2013 at 07:43 PM