urbanMamas Portland

I'm sure my 5-Yo isn't the only Portland kid to haver uttered these words: "Mama, what does a McCain sign look like?" Such a great Portland joke. So, when we trekked to the other end of the country to spend Thanksgiving with my father and drove his car (yes, the one pictured above), I was able to at least show my son what an anti-Obama sign looked like! Yes, I'm one of those lucky people whose political beliefs are no less than wildly different than both my parents.

So it was with some fear and trepidation that we jumped into this car at the Miami airport for a few days of post-election family fun. I couldn't help but wonder whether it might be productive for general American family dynamics to set election day a wee bit further from the holidays. You know?
All that holiday wine and the election mere weeks ahead of the turkey cooking.

I've got a family election story to beat all (think: parent reads blog post, child cancels cross-country holiday trip), but I'm not quite ready to divulge the details online yet - still licking my wounds offline. How did it go for you? Were you able to discuss the recent election while passing the sweet potatoes or creamed onions? Or was it best left unsaid (as with us)? Do tell, 'cause I don't like to think that I'm the only one whose holiday table was strangely quiet on the political front.

Many of us have been talking about cutting back lately.  Either because of the economic situation, or because of the environmental impacts of consumption, or because we're concerned about what might be in the things we buy. 

As the holidays approach I find myself thinking about establishing some new traditions.  I come from a family that went all out for Christmas. We got (literally) piles of gifts, aided by my dad's small yearly bonus.  In my parents' defense, they wrapped everything (underwear, socks, soap, you name it), and we didn't get much else during the rest of the year, but Christmas was definitely a big deal.  My husband, on the other hand, comes from more of a one-good-gift and a stocking household, something he hopes to continue.  So I guess you could say our ideas of Christmas morning are...different.

I don't want my kids' Christmas memories to be like mine mostly because it sends the wrong message about consumerism and materialism to open a big pile of presents, one that contradicts what we try to teach the rest of the year.  And, not to sound too cliche, but the holidays should be more about giving than getting piles of crap, right?

Ideas?  As I look for some ideas on scaling back I'm wondering: what do you do? Something from Mom/Dad?  Something from Santa?  Both?  Neither?  Any special gift-giving traditions in your house?

Or are you vowing to spend less this year? Shop local?  Shop "green"? Go plastic-free?  Buy Handmade only?  Make your own gifts?

(Photo Credit: Andrew Eick, Flickr Creative Commons)

Perhaps you can help this mama with finding the fluoride?

I've been trying without success for a week or so now to get a prescription refill for my son's fluoride tablets.  The pharmacists at Fred Meyer, Walgreen's, etc. tell me there's been a manufacturer's recall and none are available (one suggested, "just have him drink lots of water", umm...we live in PORTLAND!?)  i thought we could just get a multi-vitamin with flouride but that's not available either.  Inexplicably, his pediatric dentist is not aware of the recall (though someone is supposed to be researching and call me back.)  Has anyone else encountered this problem and/or figured out what to do?

Late last school year, my girl developed a new friendship at her school.  My girl came home talking and talking about "Penny".  We'd seen Penny at school before, and she seemed like a sweet and spunky little gal, a perfect compliment to our girl.  Our girl was beside herself when Penny invited her over to her birthday party.  Our whole family went to the birthday party, to get to know our girl's new friend & her family a little better.

We were a bit taken aback how unwelcome and uncomfortable we felt with Penny's mom.  As we got settled with the other families, Penny's mom hardly said two sentences to us.  As she prepared candles on the cake, Penny's mom was muttering under her breath.  As she took pictures of the group of kids, Penny's mom scolded her husband for not being helpful.  As she saw her in-laws (Penny's grandparents) approaching, Penny's mom rolled her eyes and audibly said, "Good grief, I can't believe they're here."  There was so much negativity and judgment coming from Penny's mom that we felt really, really awkward.

Recently, our girl has resurfaced the request to have a play date with Penny.  Likewise, Penny has asked me directly if she and our girl could plan a play date.  I keep deflecting the requests.  I'm not keen on Penny's mama, and I would hate for things to get negative while my girl was I her house, even if the negativity was not necessarily directed at my girl.  I suppose I could suggest that Penny come to our house, but I somehow can't even stomach that idea.  The whole thought leaves a bad taste in my mouth; we just weren't too fond of the idea of nurturing a relationship with Penny's family.

If you encountered a family that rubbed you the wrong way, what would you do if the kids still wanted to play?  Do we ALL have to be friends?  Awww, do we HAVE TO?

After reading the O's Season of Sharing stories today (a day late, natch), I am intensely sad and simultaneously so very grateful. And also glad that we already have underway our 2nd annual community Adopt-A-Family effort. Like last year, we hope to pool our resources to assist a local family in need over the holiday season. This year we're working with the Children's Relief Nursery. Read more and jump in on Activistas.

Gearing up for holiday travel, urbanMamas want to know: how do you get to PDX airport without having to check-in the carseat?

My husband and I are taking our 6+ month old daughter to Connecticut for Christmas and are hoping to avoid having to bring a car seat along.  We have one waiting for us at the other end (thanks grandma!).  Our plan was to take either a taxi or shuttle to the airport.  Does anyone know of a good company that will provide one?  From about half an hour of Google searches nothing comes up.  If we did have to bring out own, anyone have any experience with storing things in a locker at the airport?  Good/bad?

Thank you to the urbanMama who posted the following on the urbanMamas childcare forum:

Portland Public Schools is conducting a parent survey on before and after school care.  The results will (hopefully) have an impact on what happens in our individual schools next year.  I've been having some issues with our aftercare provider and when I called Nancy Hauth, the PPS child care coordinator, she listened to my complaints and also encouraged me to complete the on-line survey and pass it along to other parents. 

The survey should be available until December 8th and can be accessed from the following link:

http://www.zoomerang.com/Survey/survey-intro.zgi?p=WEB228EADKFQPL

I loved reading about Senator-Vice-President-Elect Joe Biden's impending move to Washington, D.C. in today's New York Times. What struck me first was that, though he's been working in the Senate for 36 years, he's never become a "fixture" in the Washington social scene: mostly because he's been rushing home to his wife and kids in Delaware. This has seriously impacted his political career, probably leading to failure in his own presidential campaigns.

What's more, he's certainly going to bring his 91-year-old mother to Washington, meaning that both the presidential and vice-presidential families will have three generations living together (President-elect Obama's mother-in-law is planning to move to the White House, too).

Many things about these family dynamics thrill me; one, that Biden's choices (to let career come after family) are more attractive examples for American managers and workers than those of Republican Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin.  Two, in light of our recent conversation about multi-generational living, it demonstrates uncommonly functional family relationships on the part of both Biden and Obama. I admit that, at first, my opinions of Biden were mostly those of the guy who made a bunch of awkward, minorly offensive statements; and now I'm starting to believe that he was chosen for his unusual values -- values best illuminated by the many quiet choices he's made as a father/husband/son. Having these ethics in the executive branch gives me hope (even if "hope" is becoming a cliche) and makes me feel more secure about our future. What do you think?

It may seem that we all live in nuclear families (parent(s) and the(ir) child(ren)), but much of my extended family still lives a couple of generations deep.  We also know of friends here who have transitioned to having a parent live with them and their children.  An urbanMama wants to hear from your experiences with multigenerational living:

My mom has recently found herself in a predicament. The man she has been with for the last 7 years has decided to up and move to the philippines. This leaves her in a home she can't afford, not to mention a very sad heart.  Because we do not own our own home, my mom has asked me, my husband, my 4 year old, and 2 year old to move into her 1800 sq ft. home.  I love my mom, and lived with her on and off after college.  I am just worried my boys are going to drive her crazy.  She works evenings, and my husband works days, so we actually will still have private family time.  But I am a stay at home mom, so the boys and I will be there all the time. I am just wondering if any other families out there are living with, or have lived with (not so old) parents?  How has it worked out, and if they have any advice for a slightly hesitant mama....

Remember way back in early '08 when we talked a lot about riding Tri-Met with kids?  The joys, the challenges, the frustrations?  Well there's an update.  Not a massive one, not a wholesale overhaul (like on the London Tube), but progress.  Check it out on Activistas.  And thanks, mamas, for weighing in, because without everyone's thoughtful, experience-based comments, we'd have never landed at a table with 12+ Tri-Met staffers.  You go! 

We are crafty folk and take pride in our creations.  What are ideas for easy homemade items that the kids can use as gifts?

We are hoping to find a great craft idea for the kids to use as holiday gifts for relatives. Last year we bought thrift store wool sweaters, washed and dried them on hot so they wouldn't unravel and then cut them into 4x4 squares. The kids used embroidery thread and big needles to sew the squares into long scarves. They were a hit! Anyone have any ideas to share?

Happy weekend, mamas!  Get out there and enjoy some great family time.

Friday

Story & a Stroll: Enjoy a short guided walk that involves education about those Trickster Coyotes. Targets kids 3-6, rain or shine. Tryon Creek State Park, 1:00-2:00 pm.

Monsters, Music, & More: Enjoy stories, music and more in a rollicking good time for the whole family with entertainer Bill Harley.  His messages are simple and varied, from “be nice to your siblings” to “be nice to the environment” to “beware of pirates who steal socks!”. Tickets available at many libraries: $5 (K-12); $10 adults. First Unitarian Church, 1011 S.W. 12th Ave, Parkrose High School, 12003 NE Shaver St. Portland, OR 97220, 7:00 pm (doors open at 6:30).

Saturday

Tapestry of Tales: Enjoy the 9th annual storytelling festival with free family performances by extremely talented entertainers. Recommended for ages 5 and up.  Free.  Performances at 11:00 am, 1:00 pm, and 3:00 pm at libraries all over town, check website for details.  The event culminates in a "Tellebration and Finale" at 7pm.

National Family Volunteer Day: The amazing folks at Hands on Greater Portland have made it super easy to volunteer with children at 7 different kid-friendly projects all over town.  Check out the website for inspiration and logistics.

Portland Nursery Open House: Sip some cider, hear some music, and see the nursery decorated for the holidays. Includes children's play area. Both locations (5050 SE Stark and 9000 SE Division), 9:00 am-6:00 pm.

Money Talks:  Geared toward pairs of girls and women, Money talks is a fun, interactive, and free economic literacy workshop made possible by Girls Inc. and UBS Financial Services.  (Target age: middle school).  Free, 1:00 - 5:00 pm, Downtown Portland/Fox Tower, Pre-registration required: Rebecca at (503)230-0054 or rebecca@girlsincnworegon.org

Family Dance: Get your groove on (and your caffeine too!) with your kiddo at this DJ spinning, kid twirling, free disco party.  Airplay Cafe (701 E. Burnside), 10:00 am-noon.

Model Train Open House: Mt. Hood Model Engineers show off their crazy-detailed layout.  Great benches to stand on so kids get a good view. Also, kids can run the Thomas the Tank Engine layout. Free, 5500 SE Belmont, Noon-5:00 pm.

Little Kids' Jamboree: Join Lorna Miller as she entertains adults and kids with music, rhythm, and movement. Mississippi Pizza (3552 N. Mississippi), 4:00 pm.

Sunday

Baby Loves Disco Pajama Party: It's back! This time they're shaking things up a bit.  Sleep in (if that's possible with kids!), roll out of bed in your pjs and get the blood flowing to some groovin' dance tunes. Wonder Ballroom, $12 for all walking humans, 12:00-3:00 pm.

About a month ago, I received a bleak email at 1am on an early Monday morning.  It was from the president of my organization.  I read the email on my smart-phone: they were announcing layoffs and paycuts for all remaning staff.  The announcement left me unable to get any more rest that night.  While my job was spared, I was still left a bit numb and sad. 

Layoffs are happening around us in our families and among our circles, left and right.  Unemployment benefits will dry up, and, when it does, will we find new jobs?  Our IRAs or 529s or other investments are half the size they used to be.  News reports constantly read "down with the dow".  And, now, businesses in our beloved Portland seem to be shuttering, one of which is an all time family-favorite, Sip 'n' Kranz (mentioned on neighborhood notes).  (Note: We stand corrected, Sip 'n' Kranz is still open! We still notice shuttering businesses, including Sal's Favorite Italian kitchen in NPDX and Mercato in NW PDX.)

Will it ever end?  How has the economic downturn hit your family?  Has your family's economic state been shaken or does it still feel a little status quo?

The only time we've talked about biting here is when big sis was biting little bro.  We know, though, that biting happens a lot with these little folks, and one urbanPapa is wondering how to handle his toddler's biting experiences at daycare:

Our 15 month old son goes to a great day care.  We agree with most of their approach and philosophy, love the energy there and have a number of friends who feel the same.  Our son has been bitten continually for the last few weeks. Theories have been forwarded about the kids needing better/earlier naps etc, but no actual solution has thus far been found. Of course we've been told that this is a "phase" and there is the real possibility that our little guy could be on the other side of the equation at some point . . . I would not be surprised if we are.

That said, I wonder how daycares can curb this kind of thing with the "never say no" methodology of teaching kids. The gentle re-direction and positive alternative-giving approach I see on the ground in the classroom don't seem all that effective to me. If anything the problem seems to be getting worse, as it is now more than one kid getting in on it. Can a culture of this kind of thing set in?  What kind of expectations (if any) are set with the parent of the kids doing the continual biting?

We are alternately pissed and then worried we are overreacting. Our pediatrician told us this morning that kid bites can cause infection more easily than a dog's . . . which did not help. :)

Can we talk about celebration a bit?

My beautiful baby boy is turning one in December and we want to have a small party. The problem is we have a very, very small place and couldn't comfortable fit everyone we want to invite, also our family lives across the country, so their houses are not options. I would have love to have it outside at a park or something but December, don't thinks so..So I need some ideas, kid-friendly resteraunts, big cafes, anything. Thanks for all your great ideas in advance!

Of course, check out all the great ideas in previous conversations on throwing birthday parties.

Are you ready for something healthy and sustainable after that talk about childhood obesity? Remember: today is the Local Lunch at Portland Public Schools cafeterias all over town. I'm heading to Pioneer School today to eat lunch with Everett (and pay penance for having screwed up the dates and missed his annual Thanksgiving Feast parent lunch yesterday, ouch!). The menu appears to have changed slightly and is now "Oven Roasted Glazed Chicken featuring Draper Valley Farms Natural Chicken." Either way, I'm looking forward to having lunch with my little boy; as Aliza Wong wrote so eloquently in her entry on Culinate, eating lunch with your child is good no matter what the ingredients.

This morning, the OPB call-in radio program, Think Out Loud, will discuss the issue of childhood obesity (at 9am and 9pm).  According to the Oregon State Physical Activity and Nutrition Program, one in four of our children are overweight.  The proportion of overweight children in our state is increaing.  The percentage of children who don't eat enough fruit & veggies is high (60%).

Despite the fact that we like to model good behavior with all our biking, homemade food, and additive-free cereal or bread choices, obesity remains a reality in our community.  The Think Out Load episode explores:

Have you struggled with childhood obesity? Are you the parent of an overweight or at-risk kid? Are you a teacher or school counselor? What barriers do you see for kids who are fighting the battle of the bulge? Who is ultimately responsible for preventing childhood obesity?

Feel free to listen, call in, or discuss here or there.

A few weeks ago, when we finally switched out summer clothes for fall clothes, I realized that there were piles of new clothes that have gone unworn.  For why?

Although the giftor, friends & family from all over, may think the fitted rugby shirt or the striped sweater is cute, the giftee, my picky little girl(s), may not agree.  So, the items go unworn.  I feel like it's such a waste.  Not all gifts come with gift receipts, and I just chuck these remains into boxes that will end up at Goodwill, consigment stores, or clothing drives.

I know I am among the privileged to have these "problems", to have gifts oozing at my children at the stroke of the holiday season.  Still: With the holiday season upon us and with family who believes in showering our children with gifts (boy we are lucky!), how are we to tactfully suggest things they may like?  Have you ever put together a "wish list" that you circulate to your family?  Can we send out holiday cards with a note "no gifts, please!"?  Should we somehow suggest contributions to their 529 plans?

After a wee post-election break, we're busy again over on Activistas.  Some recent posts - and an event - that might be up your alley:

• Activistas do the Eco Safe Home Class with the OR Center for Environmental Health (OCEH).  We've raved about these folks before, but now they're bringing it to the people!  After a really successful green cleaning class (I made my very own laundry detergent!), we're ready to expand our horizons and learn from them about the whole house.  You?
• Mary & Grady Protesting H8 & Asking for Love.  My friend Mary is strong and speaks up well and often.  Her 18-month-old son Grady is sweet and smiley and deserves respect for his mothers, his family.  Thanks to Facebook, I already have Mary's photos from today's Prop 8 protest in the South Park Blocks.
• Help a local family into housing with Metro Parent.  Marie Sherlock, Metro Parent editor, has a *BIG* heart.  This holiday season (which, by the way, appears to have already begun) she and the other good folks at the magazine are coordinating an effort to help a local family off the street and into housing.  It ain't cheap, but if we pool our resources we can do a lot together.
• This is not your father's administration.  Ever since the Coolidge administration in the 1920's, each President has given a weekly address to the American people by radio.  The Obama Administration has put their address online - good news for the TV-less among us.
• And much more, of course! 

Heidi, new to Portland from Boston, started up a listserv for NE parents to get more connected and hopes all you NE parents will join. She writes:

When I moved here from Boston, one of the things I missed was my neighborhood parents email list. It was a great forum to talk about parenting issues, local parenting news and events, and find free (or nearly free) kid gear. But more than that, it really made my community, and especially the parenting community, feel closer-- something that is very important to me. I decided that rather than simply miss my old list, it was time to start one here! By creating a list for Northeast Portland, I hope to bring a new circle of parents closer-- connecting my friends, my neighbors, and their friends.

Subscription to the list is free and, for now, this parents list is for those of us in the Northeast (generally speaking)-- the reason being that Portland is large and if we start including folks further away some of the value of making it a truly local list is lost (like being able to find an event you'd really go to before nap time arrives).

One of the great things about the list is that it's not just for one kind of parent-- it really works best when you have parents of all types (and ages!). It is great to get advice both from parents who have been doing this for a longer time and those who are experiencing the terrible twos (or thirteens) in the moment with you. So spread the word and feel free to forward this information to those parents you know and meet in Northeast Portland.

Parents for Paid Leave is still at it!  Our state legislature kicks into action in January, so we're busy getting our ducks in a row and biggering our Facebook group so we can pack a punch and bring paid family leave to Oregon.  By joining the Parents for Paid Leave Facebook group, you'll show your support for the issue and help us function well as a group - sending letters to key legislators, testifying in Salem, planning media events, and sharing our stories (they really, really matter) - among other things. 

Of course you can just join and nada mas and we'll happily feel the love of solidarity.  If you've got friends, family, partners, co-workers in Oregon who support this, by all means, share the invite.  We need all. the. help. we. can. get.  Let's hoe that tough row together, mamas. 

Join here now.  It's easy.  It's important.  Let's pass this!

It is not news to me - and probably you, either - that people think a lot about work-family balance and how to find something that even remotely qualifies.  But as social movements go, it's good to see some data, and now we have some more.  The WSJ's Market Watch reported today that an election poll "finds work and family issues are a frequent daily concern for majority of voting parents." Surprise, mamas!  In this case, news is good news, even if it's not really 'news,' because just the fact that someone's polling this stuff means we're getting somewhere.

The article reported some things we know well.  That "voters, especially women, were looking for a leader who cared about the issues that affect families, including balancing work and family."  And that "nearly three quarters of America's working fathers worry on a daily basis about meeting their work and family responsibilities."  Moms Rising's Kristin Rowe-Finkbeiner summed it up best, IMHO, because she touches on the 'is it the system or the person' issue.  She said:

"The poll results show that voters responded to the candidate who put economic security issues like paid sick days and family leave, early learning and childcare, and fair pay up front in his agenda," said MomsRising.org Executive Director Kristin Rowe Finkbeiner. "Three quarters of all mothers are now in the workforce, and it's time that we work towards solutions to the work/family problems that have long been swept aside as an epidemic of personal failings."

Of course the really good news in all this is Obama's platform for families  - makes me smile just reading the title!. 

Sorry for the delay, this week, mamas.  Without further ado, we bring you a quick, down & dirty WW.  As always, check the urbanMamas calendar for more events and ideas.

Saturday.
Oregon History Museum - Free Day.  Visit the Oregon History Museum for Free the 3rd Saturday of every month. The Oregon Historical Society's mission is preserving and interpreting Oregon's past in thoughtful, illuminating, and provocative ways. Open 10 AM to 5 PM.

Open Tike.  Kids under 12 can take the stage and use a real microphone. Children can provide their own accompaniment or choose from a list of familiar sing-a-long song tracks. 10 to 11 am, free, Airplay Cafe, 701 E Burnside.

Family Heirloom Art, Celebrating Family Stories.  Create your own illustrated family history book! You will learn how to combine writing, drawing and collage to explore your family's stories, traditions and culture. Your completed book is a wonderful way to celebrate your family stories. Optional: Bring copies of family photographs to incorporate into your book. It is not necessary to bring personal materials in order to participate.

Sunday.
Baby Wearing Gathering.  The Portland Baby Wearing group meets at Milagros on the third Sunday of the month from 11 am - 1 pm. These baby wearing gatherings are a casual forum for getting your questions on babywearing answered by other mamas and/or to share your own babywearing stories. 

Tessy and Tab Open House.  The makers of Tess and Tab reading club opens their HQ for an open house. The whole team would love to meet you.  They will be making Paper Turkeys (their next issue) - serving hot cider and coffee, and - giving preschoolers a gift issue from Tessy & Tab!  214 SE 18th Ave, 12 N to 4 PM.

The Big Green Event.  Come learn all about greening your home, school and Portland Hands On: mini classes on bike science and worm bins, canvas bag decorating, learn where your food comes from and where trash goes, make art from recyclables.  All families with lower and middle school children welcome Sunday, November 16, 2008 12:30 – 3:00 pm At the Portland Jewish Academy 6651 SW Capitol Highway Portland OR 97219 Please bring a can of food to donate to the Oregon Food Bank.

We finally borrowed a friend's fruit dehydrator this fall to see what we thought, and we loved it.  Awesome apples from the neighbor's tree and fun process with the kids.  Tasty, cheap, local snack.  What's not to love?  But now it's time to return it, and we're wanting one of our very own, natch.  I stopped by Mirador the other day, the most obvious place to snag one, but they were higher priced than I was hoping.  Some quick online searches show a bunch for under $100.  Do you have one you'd recommend?  Where'd you get it?  And for the BPA-obsessed among us (that's me!), might you know of any without it? 

And finally, the fun part: aside from the obvious apples and pears, what do you dehydrate? 

On the off chance that you don't check every page on uM every day, here are some of the latest and greatest opportunities from the uM Exchange page:

• Family holidays in the city: It's so fun!  Portraits of your family all bundled up in scarves and hats in festive colors... red noses and big big smiles.  It's a fantastic gift to give, and prints will be delivered by December 20th, just in time to frame, wrap and stick under the tree.
• Short, fat and pregnant - seeking cheap maternity clothing:  I'm looking for used maternity clothes to get me through the next 6 months. If you've got any to spare, I'd love to buy them. A mix of casual and office casual would be perfect, and I'd love a pair of good-looking boot-cut jeans that don't make me feel horribly frumpy.
• Thanksgiving ROCKS!  3 Day Camp for Kids! What?!  School is out for the entire week of Thanksgiving?  Yup!  But don't worry, Sound Roots School of Modern Music has got you covered!
• Affordable childbirth education workshop offered by experienced labor and delivery nurse:  Hey there mamas and mamas-to-be!  I am an experienced labor and delivery nurse (and mama to a 1 year old little girl, Sloane :)  offering childbirth education workshops in the Portland Metro. area. 

Last night I had the pleasure of attending an Oregon Environmental Council event to hear local author Nena Baker talk about the toxic chemicals in everyday things.  If you haven't already picked up her book, The Body Toxic, at Powell's, I highly recommend it.  It's a wealth of info about environmental health in understandable language.  I reviewed the book on Enviroblog awhile back. 

Once you've read the book there's no doubt in my mind that you'll want to support OEC's two environmental health bills in our 2009 state legislature: the Oregon Healthy Schools Act and the Children's Safe Product Act.  There is great info about both of these bills on OEC's web site, and a super easy way to stay plugged in.  All you have to do is sign up for their Healthy Kids Campaign.  They'll keep you informed about these two important, groundbreaking bills and their progress in getting them passed.  And if you're game to lend a grassroots-hand, let 'em know.  Our parent voices are critical to passing these bills.  Here's how they describe the campaign:

By signing up today, you can help us win new protections for our kids. Here’s what we’re going to do: you’ll receive updates, resources, and tips on how you can create a healthier environment in your home. We’ll also give you the tools to connect with your friends, neighbors and family so that we can make sure our state legislators know that these issues are important, common-sense action that we can all agree will help protect this place we call home. So, sign up below – let’s get started!

As someone who has been more than a little wound up about these issues lately (who me??), I'm thrilled to see OEC taking this on.  The time is now, mamas, and together we can capitalize on a unique window of opportunity.

I was nauseous in the face of herbs with my second pregnancy; with my first, I craved coffee milkshakes. I generally believe that nausea is our body's way of telling us what we should be avoiding, whether it be liquor (which I've never, not for more than a passing second, wanted in any of my pregnancies), coffee, or fresh salsa (who knows what bacterial dangers could be lurking?). Some of us can eat everything and do -- maybe those bodies are just made of sturdy stuff and don't need any special treatment? Who knows.

But many of us have been turning away from the simple carbohydrate junk food that filled our blissful teens and twenties and working to eat more "sustainably," whether we're following the lead of gurus like Sally Fallon or just trying to eat more local veggies. A mom from one of the listservs I subscribe to asked this question:

I'm pregnant and having a rough go of it.  I was sick for 9 months with my first baby with hospitalizations and all that because of the severe vomiting.

After a year of long, hard work, all the healthful food in my pantry and freezer makes me vomit, and the only things I want is crap from the store.  I am beside myself with guilt and unsure what to do.

Any advice from those of you out there who've been adopting Nourishing Traditions-style food practices in your household? Here is our previous discussion on horrible morning sickness.

OK. I confess.  I took on the moniker ‘nude mama’ last Valentine’s Day when I shared how I took naked photos of myself to give as a love gift to my significant other.  Now, I confess.  I’m a horny mama.  But, I tell ya, it’s hard to keep the lust going when that constant juggle wears me down.  How do we keep that energy going, amidst worrying about bill payments, birthday parties, family schedules, school functions, and swim class?  How do we keep that love flowing when there ain’t nothin’ dirty in the house but laundry and dishes? 

Well, mamas, I have some thoughts.  I have some ideas on how you can maybe keep that love alive with your life partner or the person you happen to be seeing at the moment.  There are some things that have worked for me.  Mamas, I bring to you: the confessions of a horny mama:

• Go multi-media: Text, email, IM/chat.  Send naughty messages on IM or text.  It’s fanciful and fun.
• Visuals are powerful.  Take pictures of self and send form your phone.  It works wonders.
• Drop hints at all times of the day.  Especially if I know he’s in a meeting, I employ tactic (a) or (b).
• Show affection, even in front of the kids.  We aren’t shy with our French kisses in our household.  No, siree.  When we kiss and we find one of our girls watching us with a smirk, we kiss again and make sure she’s watching.  We want the children to know that we love each other.
• Sunday night movies: choose a ‘chick flick’.  ‘nuff said.
• Sleep naked.  Just think: less laundry with less clothing.
• Be open.  If we’re talking about our *life* partners here, we have many, many, many years together.  I can’t imagine doing it the same way, every time.  It’s fun to try new things, spice it up, experiment with time of day, location, position, extra-added items.

Let's talk about sex, mamas, again.  What are your success stories for you to get it on?  What are barriers to entry?

We've all felt intimidation at some point in our lives especially when we're new to a situation.  Navigating schools, and understanding the way they work and how your family fits in with the structure undoubtedly takes time.  So what do you do when you as a parent are somehow pulled into the ugliness of school politics (whether guilty by association or voicing concerns threatening the sanctity of your current school), and how do you deal with it?  School politics, it can get nasty especially when there’s a fundamental difference in expectations within the school community (be it parents, teachers, or administrators). It might surpass the divisiveness of the Mommy Wars, maybe perhaps on par to name-calling and mudslinging of the partisan politics we've witnessed over the past eight years. Are you one to stand up to the 800-pound gorilla, or tread lightly and move onto greener pastures? As a parent entering a new community, have you ever felt bullied by other veteran parents of an established community? [Photo courtesy cafemama.com]

Sorry to abandon you, ladybug walks and Tryon Creek, but the rainy season is upon us!  Good thing there is lots of indoor action this weekend.  Check out the urbanMamas calendar for even more....

Friday

Storytime and Open Play at Isobel's Clubhouse: Reading, costumes, crafts and toys.  300 block of NW 10th, space is limited to 10 kids and their caregivers. 9:30-11:30 am.

NE Moms Playgroup: You don't have to live in NE to join this group of moms that gets together to play and chat.  Bring a snack to share if you can.  Milagros Boutique (5433 NE 30th), 2:30 pm.

Free First Fridays: Kids get in free to the Portland Children's Museum from 5:00-8:00 pm. Bring a gift of can food for the Oregon Food bank and create a garland of gratitude and a pinecone turkey.

Family Fun Night at St. Johns Community Center: A cheap way to get out and have some family fun. Crafts, games, and a movie. Concessions available. $1.50 per family. St. John Community Center, 6:30-8:30 pm.

Siren Nation: This weekend long event celebrates women working in film, music, performance, and visual art. Check out the website for specific activities that might be of interest including an Art and Craft Sale at the Kennedy School (11:00 am-5:00 pm).

Saturday

The Snake with Seven Heads: This Play After Play production from South Africa is about Manjusa, a woman that must dance and dance and dance to break the spell that turned her husband into a snake with seven heads. Most appropriate for kids ages 2-9.  $7 per person over age 2, reservations required. Saturday at 10:00 am and Sunday at 2:00 pm.

Keep Portland Weird: Only in Portland, truly. Performances (juggling), lessons (robotics, Japanese animation, Tai Chi, and oh so much more...), and all sorts of other weird Portland-like distractions. Central Library, 11:00 am-4:00 pm.

Kid, Maternity, and Women's Clothing Swap: Bring your gently used items to clothing swaps being held at Central Library as part of the Keep Portland Weird Festival. Kids and Maternity are in the Children's Library. The women's clothing swap is being held on the Second Floor. 12:30-4:00 pm.

Safety Saturday at the Belmont Firehouse: Learn valuable safety lessons and fire department history by exploring the old Belmont Firehouse. Hands on activities include sliding down a fire pole! 10:00 am-3:00 pm.

Family Dance: Get your groove on (and your caffeine too!) with your kiddo at this DJ spinning, kid twirling, free disco party.  Airplay Cafe (701 E. Burnside), 10:00 am-noon.

Little Kids Jamboree: Join Lorna Miller as she entertains adults and kids with music, rhythm, and movement. Mississippi Pizza (3552 N. Mississippi), 4:00 pm.

Sunday

Making Music 4 Tots:  Lots of percussion instruments, clapping, and singing will keep the kids involved in this bilingual, Spanish/ English, musical program.  Holgate Library (7905 SE Holgate), 2:00-2:45 pm.

Gourdy Pumpernickel's Harvest Surprise:  The folks from Mudeye Puppet Company have come up with a new show for fall about a determined, but silly farmer who never gives up, sure to entertain all ages. Midland Library (805 SE 122nd), 2:00-3:00 pm.

I know lots of urbanMamas have given birth with midwives, either at home, in the hospital, or at a birthing center, and we've given our feedback on certified nurse midwives before. Jess Bee asks for more of your advice:

I was wondering if anyone had suggestions for Certified Nurse Midwives at a Birthing Center in Portland. My insurance company will only cover this kind of midwife. The only one I have found so far is Michelle at Alma. Anyone have experience with her or anyone else?

As a group, we founders of urbanMamas were impassioned Barack Obama supporters. His win got to us on a number of levels: it's a thrilling realization of (what we hope is) a new era in which someone's race or gender or familial fortune is far less important than his or her intelligence, character, and values. It's a victory for grassroots politics over corporate politics (I, the MBA, am actually thrilled that the stock market plummeted the day after his victory). It's a victory for children, I truly believe that; as the camera panned across the kids up on stage with Obama and Biden, I cried even more, certain that the future of those little girls in the White House would be a better one for my little boys. It gives us hope that major policies will change for the better: chief on my list are eliminating subsidies that promote monocultures (buh-bye corn and soy subsidies), senseless transport (it shouldn't be so easy to supplant local produce, apparel, or other locally-sourced products with those from across the country, or the world), and wrongheaded decisions by financial institutions.

We're happy that Barack Obama won, and also

• Jeff Merkley (though I could do without his expensive, negative campaign); he campaigned on overhauling No Child Left Behind, fully funding public schools and Head Start programs, and creating universal access to health care.
• Kate Brown for Secretary of State
• The Children's Investment Levy renewal
• The Zoo bond; even though I have mixed feelings about the whole concept of zoos, I'd rather ours be up-to-date and taking best care of the captive animals as possible

We have hope that Obama and the other elected officials can make some enormous changes in America. We need to entirely re-think our priorities as a nation; instead of focusing on jobs above all, we need to focus on people. People who are mothers, fathers, children, aunts, uncles and grandparents. People who are farmers and freelance workers. People who do not have group health care; people who choose to live a more sustainable life. We need policies that support us. We need healthy food, first. This starts by eliminating corn and soy subsidies and making sure it's not any easier to grow food that's been genetically modified or treated with petroleum-based pesticides and fertilizers than it is organic, heirloom, sustainably-grown food. It continues by funding food as part of education; increasing the time spent at lunch and encouraging gardens at schools and the fresh prepartion of food in school cafeterias. We need better transportation policy; we need to make hard choices and recognize that the best option is the one that doesn't use oil. We need enormous infrastructure changes and a renewal of neighborhood schools so children are walking and biking to school and families can make the choice to go without a car, biking and taking public transportation instead. We need government encouragement for telecommuting so that families with parents who choose to work can do so with the minimal impact on their children. We need tax-funded health care so the choice whether or not both parents need to work can be far easier. We need far more generous paid family leave policies so that children's lives can begin with several months of low-stress bonding, easier breastfeeding, and happier mothers.

That's what I hope Barack Obama, his cabinet, and the other elected officials will do for us. What do you hope for?

I remember going with my mom to the polling place when I was a kid; there was one right at the end of our block, at 25th and Madison, so watching the people stream by all day was so exciting. I couldn't wait until I was old enough to vote. Now my six-year-old is just like me: only there's no polling place. My husband and I voted after bedtime on Friday and the only evidence was our sealed, signed ballots on the table the next morning, whisked away by my parents to drop off at the elections office.

So, how can we invest our children with the excitement of civic involvement in our vote-by-mail state? Here are a couple of things we've done (and plan to do):

• Electoral maps. There will be electoral maps to color at Backspace for the election party tonight; and last night Everett insisted I fill in every state as blue (he's loyal, that kid) on the New York Times electoral map, a fun interactive map that lets you run different scenarios while you wait.
• Mock election. Asha at ParentHacks has a fun idea with imaginary candidates who espouse candy policies and bedtimes.
• Get your freebies. Though election law now says they can't ask if you voted (nothing of value can be exchanged to induce someone to vote, or to refrain from voting), Starbucks is giving away a free tall coffee in honor of voting, Ben & Jerry is giving away free scoops from 5 to 8 p.m., and Dunkin' Donuts is giving away star-shaped pastries.
• Campaign with every last second. Moms Rising has several "get out the mom vote" campaigns, like offering to be backup childcare for friends who want to vote, and making last-minute calls to remind moms to vote. Maybe the best way to adapt this to Oregon is to offer to drop off ballots for your friends who haven't yet voted, or to stage a "voting playdate" where you bring your ballots, vote, and hand them over to one mama to hand-deliver to a ballot drop-off location.

How will you get your kids enthused about your civic involvement today?

Unaccountably, when I read this article about drugs being marketed to kids forwarded to us by an urbanMama, chills go through my spine and I wonder, should I start talking to Everett about drugs, now? He's six, and certainly old enough to get the concept. We have talked about drugs, but it was more one of those "in the far distant future make sure you don't, because..." kind of conversations.

I don't know if there's any evidence that this "Strawberry Quick" (meth mixed with Kool-Aid powder) has popped up in Portland, yet, but it's both insidious and a likely big hit in our rather meth-soaked streets. The other scary drug for beginning users is "cheese," black tar heroin mixed with Tylenol PM and snorted, rather than shot up, as regular "adult" black tar heroin is. Kid-friendly. [Shudders]

I'm going to email the drug task force in Portland and ask if there's been any reports of this stuff on our streets. In the meantime, when do you plan to talk to your kids about drugs? Have you already? Any insights?

Join Activistas, MOMocrats and Poliglots for a kid-friendly election night party on November 4th from 5 to 8ish! The party will be at the BackSpace Cafe (renamed Barackspace till the big day), which is huge, with lots of room for kids to run around and a full menu of vegetarian/ vegan food for sale. It also has a big parking lot across the street.  And remember those red & blue crayons, mamas!  Details on Activistas.

"One more time?" says Truman as we finish his latest book crush. This came in the "red bag" from school, part of a Multnomah County program to make sure underprivileged kids have books in the home.

Seriously? One more time? I thought. Even though I loved the book, I had things to do! But part of the whole reason I quit my job and am doing a few hours' daily freelance work is so I could do this, read it ah-gain. I read it again, expressively, and closed it decisively. "All done!" I said happily.

"One more time?" says Truman. "Read it ah-gain?" And this time I say, "no, two times is enough!" and head to the kitchen to finish the dishes. But I have to wonder: how many times is enough? Last night while Monroe was sleeping on my lap I read Inch by Inch four times in a row (and then it was requested again at bedtime). Later I listen to him, sitting studiously on the couch, "reading" it to himself. Be still my heart.

So repetition is good, I know from my sisters' early childhood development classes. But how much can I stand? How about you? When do you call it quits on "one more time"?

Activistas is throwing a green cleaning party with the Oregon Center for Environmental Health on NE Fremont (at their EcoSafe Home Store).  We're looking forward to learning a thing or two about toxics in cleaning supplies and whipping up a few of our own cleaners, while we're at it.  Hope you can join us on Saturday, 11.15.  Details and RSVP (required 'cause space is limited) on Activistas.