To celebrate the end of buy nothing month, I bought a new book on May 1st (not that I was, say, counting the days or anything). And I wish I could tell you it was about gardening or mummies or poetry. Nope, much better! I couldn't resist Amy Richards' most recent book, Opting In: Having a Child Without Losing Yourself, which the publisher describes like this:
Richards addresses the anxiety over parenting that many women face, in a book that mixes memoir, interviews, historical analysis, and feminist insight. Speaking as both a parent and a leading feminist activist, Richards encourages women to forge their own path while staying true to their ideals.
Scintillating, right? So, before I could even read the first paragraph (which may well be all I ever read!), I saw it written up and the author interviewed on Business Week's Working Parents blog. I wonder what you make of this Q and A with her:
Q. What surprised you the most in researching this book?
A. One of main things that surprised me is how many options already existed. I started the book and research thinking: We need flexibility in the workforce. We need mandatory paid leave. We need workplaces that respect parents. I was shocked at how many opportunities there are. I was surprised at what a great template there is to implement things I thought were in the realm of fantasy.
When you poll women with careers or middle class women, most want to exchange linear success for more of a plateau in their careers. Such as: “Rather than promoting me, how about giving me a month vacation?” We need to see that type of progress valued more.
Have you read the book? Do you agree with her? Maybe she was offered paid leave. Maybe she has enough vacation leave to spend time with her kids in the summer instead of sending them to 10 different camps. Maybe she can work from home? Get benefits for 20 hours work? Change jobs and and retain a part-time schedule? None of that applies to me, Amy! Hmmm. Are we living in parallel universes? Or should I just get more creative? Take that month off (does sound dreamy) so I can pay double health care premiums upon my return? I see, it's not the system needs fixing, it's my attitude. Better get right on that.
As a stay-at-home dad for 3 years now, I've been challenged to strike that oh-so-illusive balance between staying close to my kids during the day and returning to work at least part-time. As intellectually interesting as this book appears to be and that much of the issues Amy probably raises in the book would pertain to me, my issues as a man and father are often different.
Is anyone aware of a parallel book (or even a semi-related book) out there to Amy Richards' that pertains to fathers?
Posted by: Eric Miller | May 06, 2008 at 11:02 AM